Hiya
I was thinking and thought it might be good to have a post of sleep tips so we can find them easily in one place. Grief has quite an impact on sleep, I know I went through phases of not being able to get to sleep, to waking every night at around 2 and being awake until 4, to trying to sleep as much as i could. Theres something very lonely about not being able to sleep. So, here's some tips I am aware of, please add your own tips too if you have some
1) Firstly, try and relax. Getting agitated or worried we can't sleep will fuel the sleeping difficulties. With my early morning waking up phases I would get up, sit on the sofa with a blanket and read before trying to go back to bed. The phase would often pass after a few days, it sometimes came back after a while, but then would pass again and sleep would return
2) make your sleeping environment comfortable - not too hot or cold, not too light, comfortable bedding, reduce electronics, quiet etc
3) create a night time routine, your body will learn to prepare for sleep. Have a bath, do some gentle yoga, dim the lights, reduce using smart phones or tablets a couple of hours before bed, read. You could try some lavender oil near your pillow, see if that helps (or explore some aromatherapy)
4) try whatever you can to reduce worrying during the day. Try to occupy your day and get out for some fresh air or write down your worries and take a step, however small, towards resolving a worry. Worry during the day will impact your sleep that night. On a previous occasion when I was really distressed I found Bach flower remedies helped me when I had a mind where my thoughts churned round and round relentlessly like a washing machine. I hadnt expected it to work, i was given some when I was really struggling (with no expectation of it working) and i was amazed to find my mind became more peaceful
5) try a warm milky drink or chamomile tea. If you dont like chamomile tea you can get mixes which contain chamomile but with different flavours. Have a little alcohol if you want but not too much - too much can affect your sleep, making you restless or wake during the night. Reduce your caffeine too
6) dont eat a big meal too close to bedtime. Its believed some foods promote sleep - give them a try - yogurt, milk, oats, cereal, banana, eggs. Ive even seen a lettuce sandwich is supposed to help
7) a lack of magnesium and calcium may cause people to wake after a few hours and not return to sleep, try magnesium rich foods incl spinach, bananas, nuts, seeds, fish and wholegrains
Its a hard journey, be gentle with yourselves. Add any sleep tips you have
xx