Thanks Penny,that’s brilliant,thank you.
He’d suffered bad mental health problems for years and years,having lots of failings along the way. It all got too much for him last January and he decided suicide was the best way,me and my children (14yr old and 5 yr old girls and 2yr old and 7 month old boys) were in the house as he took his life in the garage,unknowingly to us what he was doing. Intensive care followed for a week untill I switched off his ventilator and watched him go to theatre to donate his organs.
It’s hard,tiring,lonely and stressful.
He was my every breath and I’ve fumbled my way through up to yet trying to hide behind a false ‘I’m ok’ and I need to deal with things as it’s getting harder and harder.