Yesterday morning I saw a headline that a lady had saved an elderly lady who had gone Into cardiac arrest, I quickly turned over but it has upset me so much over the last two days, in August my Mum went into cardiac arrest I fought really hard to save her, the ambulance people asked me to make a decision whether to continue I said stop, and now I am right back to that night again, they said she a thready pulse, that her brain was fighting, that's what they told my husband anyway, it was only August and I miss her so much, I feel a failure the one time she really really needed me I let her down