Introducing myself

[Whitedawn]

Hi I'm whitedawn and really struggling after losing my mum unexpectedly in November

[pennyking]

Hi Whitedawn and welcome.  Very sorry for your loss and you have needed to find our group.  You must be devasted and still in shock at losing your Mum.  When you are ready please tell us about yourself and your Mum.  Take care Penny. X

[Norma]

Sending you a welcome hug Whitedawn, please keep talking to us xxx

 

[Whitedawn]

My mum was my best friend I visited her everyday. I lost my dad traumatic ally 4 years ago and suffered PTSD I have not recovered from that and now my mums gone! I have never hurt so much in my life. I miss her so much I'm lost.

[Emz2014]

Sending a welcome hug    sorry for your loss, its such a rollercoaster, you are not alone here xx

[Whitedawn]

I always go to mums at 6 but on this day I went to slimming world and so was late we found mum in her kitchen in a very distressing way and it was too late. She did have COPD but my brother left her at 3 and she was absolutely fine. I will never forget that night I remember running into the street screaming for my mum and begging the ambulance people to make her better. I begged on my knees for anyone to make her better. I haven't slept properly since and I've never hurt so much. What if I'd not been late? I feel so guilty that I wasn't there and that she could have been really scared on her own and in pain. I feel like I'm going mad. I just want my mum.

[Hubby]

Welcome to the forum Whitedawn. I am so sorry to hear of your loss. 

[Norma]

Whitedawn hun i feel  your pain, but you know its a normal stage of grief, we have to find someone to lay the blame on, And it is usually  us,sweethear please be kind to yourself take each day as it comes, baby steps, believe me you will get there   xxx

 

[Whitedawn]

I'm not so sure I can't see this ever being better. I need my mum   

[Hubby]

It's very early days for you. I know it sounds like a cliche but even though it may not seem like it right now you will be able to cope better over time.

Wishing you strength

[Whitedawn]

I only lost my dad 4 years ago and hadn't got over that really then my daughter had a miscarriage in August and now my dearest mum has been taken from me. I can't cope with much more. One minute I'm ok then I'm an utterly mess. I sat with my dad all night on my own till he passed in the early hours. I'd been to Ireland and got back to Leeds airport as I got the call to go straight to hospital. I watched dad suffer and he even begged me to help him but I couldn't I never left his side but I wasnt able to do that for mum she was alone and I can't handle that. Plus the way we found her wasn't nice at all. It's as if someone keeps playing a movie in my head and I can see and hear every detail and can't switch it off.

[Emz2014]

Be gentle with yourself. Need to take baby steps and give yourself TLC.  I can understand,  my dad passed away on his own and my sister found him on the hallway floor. You are not to blame.  It will take some time but it will get easier to cope.  xx

[Whitedawn]

I'm really struggling! I feel so lonely I really need my mum.

[Emz2014]

Sending a big hug   
Do you have some family or friends nearby?  Has anything happened that you would like to talk about? 
The loneliness is a normal part of bereavement,  which, knowing that doesn't make it any easier to cope with I know :-(   it won't feel like it now,  but it will get easier xx

[Whitedawn]

I went to my mums every day at 6 till 8 and today hubby is on nights and son has gone out. I just hate this time of day don't know what to do with myself plus it was during this time of day I found mum 😢😢