I lost my husband on the 10th December 2010, funeral was 20th. I've learnt that you don't have to be strong all the time, you have to show your grief to show your kids that it's ok to grieve. Yes you carry on best you can, but everything is an effort and you do your best and that's all anyone can do. Its good to be able to put things down in writing on here, as others have no idea. Take care and sending hugs. Penny x