Welcome...I hope by posting on here will help a little, we all know what it's like to lose someone very close to us, and because of that we understand exactly what it feels like and what you are going through.
A forum even one so unique as this one, is only as good as it's members, and the members on here are the most supportive, considerate, and caring people I've ever had the pleasure to meet. I hope chatting to us gives you as much comfort as it gave to me when I first joined, and indeed still does.
For a mother to lose two children has to be the worst nightmare due to that bonding from birth.
As parents none of us ever want or expect to survive our children. My sincere Condolences.
Here's a special hug from me, we all need hugs at times like this..
You take care.
Best wishes.....
Brian..xx