Hello kayHN, so sorry to hear about the loss of your Mum,
As Hubby stated, sometimes us fathers because of our own grief, we tend to overlook to some extent the effect the loss of a Mum has on our own children, my daughter now 40 herself was very close indeed to her Mum, as although my daughter lives down in Cornwall some 235 mile away, they always spoke on the phone virtually every evening. One can talk upto an hour for free on the phone, and they both made full use of that...lol. I suppose since her Mum passed away, I've sort of taken over that role, and she has been of great support, I like to think we have given each other support, we have certainly become much closer and now we too speak every evening without fail. She was severely affected by the loss far more than my two sons, who rarely speak about their Mum, and indeed it's rare they phone, their grieving finished at her funeral, we can go weeks without speaking, partly because they lead busy lives with the business, and are out of the country quite a lot.
I think daughters do tend to be closer to their Mums, IOW like a best friend, I was the same with my dad before he passed away years ago, in fact my wife and I took them on holiday with us for two weeks every year for more than 40yrs, dad was my best mate. He always regarded my wife Ann as the daughter he never had but always wanted, and because she never knew her parents as she was in foster homes from the age of 2yrs he was the father she never had. However, coping mentally when they are gone is never easy, particularly so when it's your Mom, Wife or Husband, my world came to an end when I lost my wife, there are many here who have gone through and are still feeling that same feeling of loss, grief is something that rarely gets discussed or generally mentioned very much.
Throughout our lives most of us attend relatives funerals or friends funeral, and of course it's a sad time, but it does not have the same impact on us like losing someone extremely close to you personally. I can think of nothing worse than losing a wife or husband or as in your case a Mum, and yet it's happening all the time, we read about people losing their lives daily in newspapers etc. and then suddenly one day it happens to you and then for the first time you discover what grief really is, as many people simply don't understand unless it's happened to them.
Here KayHN we do know how you are feeling, because we feel the same, and I truly hope you get some comfort knowing you are not alone, sometimes it helps to let it out and talk about how you feel, we have all done it here and it does help. We take it a day at a time, a common phrase used a lot on here because that's the best we can hope for, but has time passes, hopefully we learn how to handle the grief we feel.
I'm told this is normal behaviour and I've accepted that and in time you will too, and given time we will all manage to get through days without breaking down in tears all the time, but crying because you miss a loved one is completely normal we have all done it and still do often, it's our release valve.
I hope you keep posting KayHN..you will find it will help.
Please accept this big hug, we all need a hug from time to time...
Best wishes....Brian
.............................and remember...........a day at a time..........it will get easier.
