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Author Topic: Grief and starting over  (Read 3566 times)

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Offline Lindylou

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Grief and starting over
« on: July 30, 2016, 10:46:10 AM »
Hi everyone. This is a long shot but wondering if anyone has been through this. A bit of general information to start. I lost my husband in March 2015 he was 24 yrs older than me and I always knew I would lose him. I had been his carer for the past few years before he passed.
Now to the present I started dating again 7 months ago seeing someone totally unsuitable who puts me down and is always finishing with me but I can't let go. I cry all the time and beg him to take me back. This has been going on for the 7 months I just can't let go and each time it feels like grieving all over again and i go into a deep depression.i let him treat me like dirt and do anything for him. Please help if you can before I end up having a break down or worse
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Offline Emz2014

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Re: Grief and starting over
« Reply #1 on: July 30, 2016, 06:33:51 PM »
Perhaps you are seeking a connection with someone, so it is that (a sense of connection) you are returning to rather than him.  I feel there is a stage in grief when we are numb and lost and just need to feel something and sometimes reach out to something that isnt really good for us

Do you have good friends around you, or family you are close to? Xx
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Even the darkest night will end and the sun will rise. 
Hold on in there xx

Offline Julie Magson

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Re: Grief and starting over
« Reply #2 on: July 30, 2016, 06:55:04 PM »
Hello- you say yourself that this relationship is unsuitable so you already know that and don't need anyone to tell you! I wonder if you are clinging onto him because it is a man and you feel safe with a man there whether he is good for you or not? My gut instinct says he won't be good for you but I know that's not really helpful right now. You might need to go to your GP and find some counselling and comfort there. :hug:
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Offline colin

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Re: Grief and starting over
« Reply #3 on: July 30, 2016, 07:10:32 PM »
Hi,
   Rid yourself of this millstone or excuse of a partner,if he treats you like dirt ,first you need better before the treatment which you say he gives you turns nasty,be strong for yourself.
                                              all the best
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Offline Lindylou

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Re: Grief and starting over
« Reply #4 on: July 31, 2016, 05:24:37 PM »
I wish it was as easy as that to rid myself of him but when I'm not with him I am lost. I hate being at home and even when I'm out I'm very unhappy and cry a lot. I have good family and my church but nothing is helping. I have dogs as well but I must admit I am neglecting them. If you asked what I like about this man I could not answer. I am wondering if this could be delayed grief. Will it ever be any different
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Offline Julie Magson

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Re: Grief and starting over
« Reply #5 on: August 01, 2016, 02:26:03 PM »
Try and speak to your GP about it if you haven't already Lindylou.
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