Introduction

[Helen_S]

I wrote a long introduction but it disappeared because I had been logged out while I wrote it. Fixed that now but here is a shorter one.

I lost my husband nearly 6 years ago, very suddenly aged 60. Before that I was quite a confident person with a fairly high powered stressful job but afterwards I couldn't really cope, with the result that I was made redundant 1 year ago.

Now I am still not able to make decisions very easily and find it hard to be cheerful or happy.

I decided to write this and rejoin the forum as I know people on here know what I mean. I also hope I might be able to help someone else.

Thanks for reading
Helen

[Joann]

Welcome Helen.

[sue smith]

I know that feeling Helen,  it was a little different for me but I was my husband's carer for more than 40 years and when he died I went from being busy all the time to nothing,  I made all the decisions because of his illness but I lost that ability.  Had mega problems trying to decide whether to have milk delivered or buy it when shopping.  I also worked as general manager of a hire company employing only men so was used to taking control but I just lost it as I lost Colin.   It does get better,  it takes time and the missing never goes but the coping comes back.  xx

[Hubby]

Welcome to the forum Helen, or should that be welcome back?

I too have difficulty making decisions since I lost my wife 4 months ago. At first I dodged making them completely or even getting into a situation where I might have to make one. I am past that hurdle now but when faced with decisions it's as if there's some sort of barrier there that stops me thinking. The simple truth is that, as far as I am concerned, the worst has happened so it doesn't really matter if I make a decision or not so I don't put any thought into it.

I hoping it gets better with time but I know I am changed forever.

Wishing you strength