Hi,
I'm Becks. I have never used a site like this, and to be honest I'm not entirely sure what I expect to get from joining. I lost my Nan in March and her funeral was held in April. She had a great life (92 when she passed) and to be honest her passing was for the best as she suffered a lot the past 10 years of her life. I'm not really sure how I now feel, but some days I feel angry that she is gone, other days sad to have lost her and at other times guilty that I feel any of this as I know that there are people in much worse positions than me and my family.
Joining this site is somewhat of a knee jerk reaction I'm afraid. I was watching Britains Got Talent tonight (no judging please!) and there was a Mother and Daughter singing together. I don't know why but I burst into tears. Just something about how close they were really got to me and made me realise how much I miss my Nan. She was the closest person in my life and whilst I am so pleased that she is now at peace, I am feeling incredibly lonely without her, and if i'm really honest, I'm feeling mad at her for leaving me. Does that make me selfish?
I didn't expect to find myself sitting here and typing all of this, but hey, better out than in right?
Like I say, I really don't know what I am expecting, but I figure that I can't keep all of these feelings bottled up forever.
So Hi everyone! this is me....Apologies for my ramblings!
Becks x