Lost my mum suddenly last week

[Cher]

Just searching for a bit of peace and comfort from those who are in a similar situation to me. I lost my lovely mum just last week the 2nd May.  she was only 64. She had a sore throat and a cough but felt well enough to cook Sunday dinner for the family that night!  and in the early hours of the morning she developed breathing problems so dad took her to A&E. She apparently had Strep A virus which led to fatal pneumonia and they couldnt save her. She died within 24 hours. I am in deep shock and in disbelief. She was the best mum i could ask for, she was my rock, my life coach.  My heart is broken. My 2 children (7 & 10) are devastated. My poor dad has lost his soul mate of 45 years. My poor nana (90) has lost her daughter. I feel like a massive hole has been smashed in our lives, out of the blue.  How do I go on without her? I just dont understand how this has happened.  I have no words to describe the pain and the panic i feel. I am just numb. I have to be strong for my kids and know mum will want me to carry on.  I have to believe that we will eventually be ok. Just different. Just stronger. Lots of love to those out there experiencing the same darkness. xxxx

[Emz2014]

Sending a welcome hug 
I lost my dad after a short battle with cancer, its a tough journey. We were really close and he would often come on holiday with us, and dad & I would go out on day trips exploring places.  Lost him shortly after his 59th birthday.  It will get easier to cope in time, but it takes time.  Its a rollercoaster journey, it pulls the foundations out from underneath us.  Be gentle with yourself, take small steps.  You are amongst a great bunch of people who understand xx

[Hubby]

Hi Cher. Welcome to the forum. I am so sorry to hear of your families loss.

It's very early days for you all and the full reality of what has happened may not have sunk in. During the first few weeks we tend to be in shock and operating on autopilot somewhat. You should concentrate on being there to help each other get through all the arrangements that need to be made and the funeral. Just being close and talking helps a lot.

You may not see how you can carry on and even think you are losing your mind at times but you will eventually get through this. 

[Joann]

Hi Cher, so sorry for your loss.

[mrs40something]

My thoughts are with you and I fully understand how unbelievable this seems.  I lost my Mum on the 4th March after a 6 month battle with heart and kidney failure. I try to take comfort in the fact we had those 6 months and can't imagine how much of a shock this is to you and your family.
I am still not believing how we can carry on without her. 
As you say you do eventually learn to live a new life, but never forgetting her. instead of the immense sadness, you will eventually have happy memories. But the grief will always be there, and I am finding it hard to realise that my life will never be the same again, or me. Everything changes. I try to take comfort in knowing she is just a bit further down the road from me now... she has gone on ahead of me and one day we'll meet again.  Not everyone believes, but I do and find it comforting.
Grief is as individual as the person and deals with it differently, so if you want to cry, cry as it helps you to heal.
I've had a relatively good week, finally thinking I may be getting a grip on reality again, but then today have sobbed all morning, as me and Dad went to collect her ashes. All came back to me what has happened.  They were together for over 50 years and feel grief for my Dad too as he's now all alone.
It is the hardest thing I have ever endured. Hoping you can find some comfort. Take care. xxxx

[Norma]

Sending a welcome hug xxx

 

[sovague]

So sorry for your loss, it is so hard to deal with. I really wish i could help you but sending you a big hug.

[longedge]

I have to believe that we will eventually be ok.

... and so you will Cher. My condolences to you and yours.

[antigone]

Just searching for a bit of peace and comfort from those who are in a similar situation to me. I lost my lovely mum just last week the 2nd May.  she was only 64. She had a sore throat and a cough but felt well enough to cook Sunday dinner for the family that night!  and in the early hours of the morning she developed breathing problems so dad took her to A&E. She apparently had Strep A virus which led to fatal pneumonia and they couldnt save her. She died within 24 hours. I am in deep shock and in disbelief. She was the best mum i could ask for, she was my rock, my life coach.  My heart is broken. My 2 children (7 & 10) are devastated. My poor dad has lost his soul mate of 45 years. My poor nana (90) has lost her daughter. I feel like a massive hole has been smashed in our lives, out of the blue.  How do I go on without her? I just dont understand how this has happened.  I have no words to describe the pain and the panic i feel. I am just numb. I have to be strong for my kids and know mum will want me to carry on.  I have to believe that we will eventually be ok. Just different. Just stronger. Lots of love to those out there experiencing the same darkness. xxxx

Sorry to hear about your sudden loss. You sound like you have such lovely memories of her which you can reminisce on when times are tough <3

[Norma]

Welcome and always know there is always someone here for you xx