Hello Scared, my condolences on your loss. Three months is a significant waypoint for a lot of people and I was at about that point when I was offered a place in a support group hosted by our local hospice where Chris died last October. I clearly remember that one of the first things I said in our first meeting was, "It's just getting worse, not better." There were 14 of us in the group and everyone was at more or less the same stage and all agreed they felt the same. I'm sure the grieving process is different for everyone and I know we all have the same feelings and emotions but at various times but I believe that what you are feeling right now is common to almost all of us. It will get a little easier as time goes by. If you have the chance, talking to people in the same position as you does help.
The group meetings for me were a safe place to let my emotions out. A place where you could cry, sit quietly, even laugh occasionally in the knowledge that everyone understood.