I understand you must post 3 times. This is my third post.
I am angry at the staff in the nursing home for not picking up on my Mums breathing prob earlier. I feel awful guilt about not visiting her more often and not being able to visit her after the baby, and for not trying to bring her to our house and trying to make it work. I feel so lonely because I'm an only child and the family are not close. Plus my husband does not do sympathy well, his attitude is why cry, it doesn't solve anything! I cry for all she went through. Whilst I was busy arranging the funeral I didn't have time to stop and think too much, and it was the final thing I could do for Mum. Now it's over I feel empty. I feel like I want to do it again. I don't want people to go back to their daily lives. I feel so much sorrow I'm finding it hard to care for my little ones. I have been constantly worrying about Mum for the past 2 years, I feel like - now what???