I'm not sure if this is a normal symptom of grief, but along with the exhaustion, I'm finding I'm becoming increasingly angry and impatient and although I do appreciate the company of my friends sometimes, the past week has been difficult as I juggle my job, my pets and trying to stay on top of everything else.
As I explained to Karena and Sandra, I have a front facing job so I am required to be the meeter and greeter and smiler - which is hard on days when you haven't been bereaved, but now it's becoming impossible and my tolerance is very much lowered. I am quick to tell people if they are too much or in my face and am speaking out more than I used to be able to, for the benefit of myself and my mind, not necessarily in a rude way.
However, I am having real issues with one guy at work who started with us recently. Without going into too much detail, he's a security guard who works near me and oh my God - he NEVER shuts up. If you have met the Queen, he's had dinner with her, if you've had chicken pox, he knows someone who invented it, if you can see a full moon, he's an astronaut. Everyone in our team is commenting on it, and I raised it recently with my manager but nothing has been done.
He seems to have taken a bit of a shine to me because I'm friendly and polite and do not wish to hurt or annoy anyone. But I am NOT in the headspace to be listening to someone who TALKS AT ME and does not know when to take a step backwards. Most of the time, I just want to do my job and go home - and I have a golden (GOLDEN) 2 hours when my colleague leaves where it is quiet and without interruption.
If this guy sees a hook to talk to me he will take it. More often than not, he is not doing what he is supposed to be doing but he's standing hovering over my desk as I sit down. I'm quite small and he's over 6 foot so that in itself is intimidating. I made the mistake of telling him when he asked me today how I was and I said 'not so good' and now he's saying he's going to come over on his HOUR'S break to sit and talk to me. I very calmly said to him 'No it's ok thanks - I'm not a talker and I need my time to myself'. He ignored this and said 'Och I know but it's good to chat I'll be over later'. I've actually had to ask a couple of my male colleagues if they can distract and/or tell him that I am busy and need to be left alone today. I am worried he will appear anyway and if he does I am liable to crack up.
I finding him very overbearing, he interrupts constantly and gives you all the advice he thinks you need despite not asking for it. He even tried to tell me what I should do with my Mum's house and I told him to stop. He's just the type of guy that seems to know it all.
Does anyone have any advice for how you can ask someone within a work environment to leave you alone and not offend them? I have tried several times and also highlighted with his own boss that he isn't doing what he's meant to be doing (he's in security and he's standing with his back to the door in a very busy high profile building) - but as yet nothing has changed.
It's getting to the point with him that I am ready to ring in sick if I know he's going to be on shift. My head literally can't take anymore of listening to him and I don't know how to handle it without causing a problem or offence.
I don't know if anyone here has experienced that intense feeling of needing people to SHUT UP while going through grief??
Appreciate any thoughts or advice,
Sarah