- Jill just to clarify Georges posts admins/moderators are here pretty much every day and if necessary we filter out spam or inappropriate posts before they appear on the general boards -occasionally though we dont get there in time - and members report it first - which is where the link comes in, but generally we do get there early.
Very occasionally we get some one who joins for the wrong reason - a young Russian female apparently looking for a new husband - people advertising escort services - people advertising counselling which may be genuine and may be helpful but whose qualifications we know nothing about. - people who join but would be better placed on dating sites etc - and occasionally some-one who has other issues but unrelated too a loss, we might point in the direction of other forums more fitting to those issues.This is why we also have the rule on not allowing posting links to outside resources without asking us so we can check them more fully.
Occasionally as well as what is posted on the boards here people have sent inappropriate private messages - we dont ever read private messages between members unless some-one reports them and forwards their content too us -so its not that we are snooping at all and again it is really rare that it happens,I have been an admin for five or six years and can only think of a couple of times that has happened so please dont worry about it.
Extremely rarely in busier times than now there has been a squabble between members or a member has taken offence at some-one elses post reported it too us and we have mediated and sorted it out.
The reason we do it is because people who are here genuinley, are often in a very vulnerable situation - and because of that we sometimes might appear stricter than other forums or social media here -but please rest assured the idea for is purely to do what we can to protect our members because we feel it needs to be a safe space and that is important to keep it safe to the best of our abilitys.
Not everyone in cyber space is a charlatton but as with many things in life those that are, spoil it for the rest - and sometimes as you will know, grief can mess with our normal thinking patterns or for some maybe they are not used to the internet at all and dont know the potential pitfalls - so if for example,at the extreme end of cases you for some reason wrote your adress and phone number openly here or if you were a small business as well as a grieving member the adress of your own website where they might be available, we would remove them and send you a message saying why but just to keep you safe not as any kind of criticism.
We dont take arbitary decisions about people or field normal posts from genuine members - we are not here to judge you or what you write.Occasionally (and compared to another non related forum i moderate on extremely occasionally) we need to troubleshoot.
But we are primarilly here to help, because we are all in this same journey ourselves but are further along it and stronger now than we used to be - Admins and moderators are always without exception also existing members who joined the forum ourselves when we were also very vulnerable and had others looking out for us in the same way.