Author Topic: Making plans...  (Read 58 times)

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Offline Buttercup

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Making plans...
« on: October 07, 2019, 07:03:28 PM »
Hi, I've added lots about my situation on the newbies page. But very briefly my mum died very suddenly in March. Some days I cope, some days it's hard to even get out of bed...
My heart is broken as I was not ready to say goodbye I was not ready to be alone and I feel like a small child again that incapable of making decisions for herself.
But for all my pain and sadness, I think of my poor dad. Married for 40 odd years to his soul mate... She organised and ran everything and now he is alone and I hate to think of his sadness and loneliness.
He's doing amazing, btw, and Im incredibly proud of him.
When I'm with him I feel safe and childlike again... And if I'm honest, sometimes I daydream I can just stay there forever, just us and not have to deal with every day life, work, responsibility and my own family. Which makes me feel very guilty.
As my family have been so supportive.
Sorry, this is all a bit of a waffle... I don't really talk about any of this with anyone. Thanks all ♥ 🕯
Trying to get thru, one day at a time 💔

Offline Sandra61

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Re: Making plans...
« Reply #1 on: October 07, 2019, 11:08:59 PM »
I think we all struggle with the 'normal' everyday things when we are grieving, Buttercup. It is hard to focus or feel any interest in anything else when something so catastrophic has happened in our lives.

You are lucky to have a supportive family who understand and are trying to help you through this. You can say whatever you wish to us here though, so feel free. We do not judge and waffling is fine! We have been where you are and understand what you are going through.  :hearts: :hug:

Offline Emz2014

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Re: Making plans...
« Reply #2 on: October 09, 2019, 11:45:34 AM »
That sounds so familiar - so many times I wished I didnt have to 'adult' for a while!

The grief rollercoaster is hard, in time you will gain/learn coping techniques. Years down the line, we never ever forget them but the pain becomes easier  :hug:
Even the darkest night will end and the sun will rise. 
Hold on in there xx

Offline Buttercup

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Re: Making plans...
« Reply #3 on: October 09, 2019, 01:26:10 PM »
Thank you again Emz, I do cherish and look forward to my special time with my dad now 😍
It certainly is a horrible roller-coaster ride!
Thanks again for reply ♥
Trying to get thru, one day at a time 💔

Offline Emz2014

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Re: Making plans...
« Reply #4 on: October 09, 2019, 09:06:22 PM »
 :hearts:
Even the darkest night will end and the sun will rise. 
Hold on in there xx

Offline Janlmb

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Re: Making plans...
« Reply #5 on: October 13, 2019, 11:19:17 PM »
Both my parents died in their early 60's and I totally understand you feeling like an orphaned child Buttercup.  I know I did.  It must be very hard for both you and your Dad and it is good that you are enjoying your time with him.  As people have said it is a rollercoaster andI'm just trying to take each day since my husband died and get through it.  This forum is a great help as I don't have people to share things with, sending you a hug  :hug: