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Bereavement Support Posts => Please Post In This Bereavement Support Posting Room => Topic started by: KarenMB on September 11, 2019, 10:46:23 PM

Title: Heartbroken after losing my Dad
Post by: KarenMB on September 11, 2019, 10:46:23 PM
Hi I'm Karen, my darling Dad passed on 9/6/19 after a short illness. I watched him degrade over 3 weeks in hospital until he ended up on life support in intensive care, only to loose his battle anyway after fighting so hard. His organs failed from overwhelming sepsis but he carried on fighting for 12 hours after his life support was stopped.
Its very difficult to put into words the pain I feel at the moment. After weeks of just being numb and on auto pilot, grief has now struck me like a double decker bus, precisely at the time my sick pay has run out and I have had to return to work.
I am a chemotherapy sister and my job is stressful and calls for me to give a lot of emotional support to the patients and relatives. Before Dad died this was not a problem but now I feel like a shell, I have nothing to give. My Dad would be so upset if he knew this, but I cant help it. I adored him and I don't think i'll ever be the same again. My manager and colleagues appear to be finding this frustrating, work now just feels so awkward. They were expecting the Old Karen to return to work and just get on with it like I always did before, but I can't.  I just don't know what to do with myself.
Thanks for listening X
Title: Re: Heartbroken after losing my Dad
Post by: Sandra61 on September 11, 2019, 11:59:56 PM
Sending you a welcome hug, Karen,  :hug:

You are right. Loss does change you and that must be particularly difficult in your line of work. I do sympathise. Is there perhaps any way you could transfer to another less stressful role for a time, until you can begin to find your feet again? I can't imagine trying to do something like you do whilst dealing with grief as well. Could you go to see your GP and explain this to them. They might be able to sign you off for a bit longer or refer to occupational health who also might be able to help.

Losing a parent is devastating and sadly, those who have not been through it do have trouble understanding what you are going through. I hope you manage to find a way around this. I can see why it is causing you so much additional strain.

We are here to listen and for you to unload to at least. Keep talking to us.  :hug: