Author Topic: Still crying every day  (Read 4955 times)

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Offline rawareham

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Still crying every day
« on: May 15, 2017, 08:30:54 PM »
I lost my dad suddenly on 1st April last year. He had just turned 60 and was healthy. He went to bed, had a brain hemorrhage and never woke up. It's been a year but I still feel how I felt when I was told and I miss him so so much every day. I don't know how to face the rest of my life without him-I know I have too as I have 2 young sons who need me but inside I'm just screaming for my own dad to come back every single day.

Not sure why I'm posting just need to get it out somewhere-life goes on and people stop asking about it but I still need to get my feelings out? I love him so much and I just miss talking to him and hearing his voice so much xx

Offline Emz2014

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Re: Still crying every day
« Reply #1 on: May 16, 2017, 07:34:59 AM »
Have you been able to talk about your loss?  I found talking helped me, hope you find support here xx
Even the darkest night will end and the sun will rise. 
Hold on in there xx

Offline rawareham

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Re: Still crying every day
« Reply #2 on: May 16, 2017, 09:52:08 PM »
Yes I do and I've started seeing a counsellor once a month so I have space to talk about it. I just miss him so bloody much, like we all do. It feels like groundhog day doesn't it? I keep wishing I'll wake up and things will be different and he will be back but he never is.

I'm really lucky I have 2 amazing little boys who keep me smiling but it's just so hard and lonely xx

Offline Karena

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Re: Still crying every day
« Reply #3 on: May 17, 2017, 06:49:41 PM »
Yes its lonely,even if we share grief for the same person with others,people grieve differently and had their own bond with them its never quit the same.There is also an expectation by people who don't know grief that somehow it switches off at about a year,so because they expect it of us we put pressure on ourselves ,and think something is wrong with us,when in reality it is something that lives with us and fades then resurges and takes its own path.
When I lost my husband I wanted my grandchildren to remember him,even the ones yet to be born who missed out on knowing him. Making a memory box with your children might help,when you're ready,because when we share happy memories they become the ones that are foremost in our minds.

Offline quietstorm

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Re: Still crying every day
« Reply #4 on: May 27, 2017, 12:24:37 AM »
Just sending a  :hug:
I'm new here. I lost my Dad in 2008 and lost my husband 11 weeks ago to a brain haemorrhage so I understand a little about how devastated you are  :cry:
It's really awful to lose our loved ones I know, and I'm finding this sudden loss just so unbelievably hard.
 :hearts: 

Offline dizzylizzy

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Re: Still crying every day
« Reply #5 on: June 18, 2017, 08:31:13 PM »
My mum died last Feb and I feel like you. I miss her so much, everyday xxx

Offline Cee Cee

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Re: Still crying every day
« Reply #6 on: June 24, 2017, 02:02:19 AM »
I lost my Dad last January and I very close friend a few weeks again.  When my father passed I was not able to grieve as my Mum needed my help.  Also my friend who has just died was very ill at the same time ( she battled cancer for 14 years.). I held in my grief as I needed to support both of these women in my life.  Both women took up a great deal of my time, which I have been happy to give.  Sadly my friend lost her battle a few weeks ago and now grief has fit me doubly.  I am a positive, if a little nurvey person.  Depression is not part of my character.  My place of safety in my house is my bed and I have been there nearly ever day since my friend died.  My whole livfe has collapsed.  I just can't cope anymore.  I just seem pathetic. My cat is the only thing that is keeping me alive.

Offline Karena

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Re: Still crying every day
« Reply #7 on: June 24, 2017, 05:29:46 PM »
Hi cee cee
Its not at all pathetic,sometimes being strong and trying to suppress your own grief at the same time is just too much for anybody.Wanting to hibernate is a really natural response too that.I think I would have stayed in hibernation forever if I hadn't had my dog to look after. :hug:

Offline rawareham

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Re: Still crying every day
« Reply #8 on: June 27, 2017, 08:40:24 PM »
You aren't pathetic at all -I'm so sorry it's been such a difficult time. When you hold it together for so long, it can be doubly hard when you then let your feelings out. How are things today?

After visiting my doctor I decided to take antidepressants for a while and it has helped -I still cry a lot of days about dad but I feel like I have just a little head space to try to deal with what has happened and losing him-rather than feeling like I could think of nothing else and with a million thoughts racing round my mind every second. Does that make sense? Xx