Author Topic: Hello  (Read 21981 times)

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Offline Emz2014

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Re: Hello
« Reply #60 on: October 09, 2019, 09:05:53 PM »
Pop back to the Dr and ask if you can be referred for counseling, and whether theres any other support available. Sometimes we need a helping hand
And you're not alone here  :hug:
Even the darkest night will end and the sun will rise. 
Hold on in there xx

Offline Buttercup

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Re: Hello
« Reply #61 on: October 09, 2019, 09:43:59 PM »
Oh that is such a lot to be carrying by yourself, I know you said your friends stopped asking or offering help (mine have too) but would there be one of them you could approach for a cuppa and a natter.?or even someone that could mind your little one for just a while so you could have some time out and maybe a nap by yourself?
You are doing an amazing job being a strong mummy and daddy to your daughter, please know that and I am sure your dad is around you every day and is so very proud of your courage and determination.
I am sorry you are having to also deal with your unreasonable ex. Divorce is so hard and heartbreaking, more so when there's a little one involved. Sometimes men can act like spoilt toddlers themselves!
I thank you for keep talking and sharing, I hope it's helping? I wish I could help more, but I am listening and am sending you virtual hugs and strength ♥
Trying to get thru, one day at a time 💔

Offline Sandra61

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Re: Hello
« Reply #62 on: October 10, 2019, 01:07:59 AM »
Hi Sarah, so sorry to hear that everything is still proving so trying for you. I agree with Karena, you are going through all the most stressful experiences we can suffer at once, so don't be so hard on yourself. You are coping really well considering the amount of pressure you are under. My thought was the same as Emz's. I would go back to the doctor and request referral for counselling. I think it is much more beneficial than anti-depressants. Also, how about going along to social services to see if they can help you out in some way? It might be worth asking to see if there are any practical ways you can get some help and relief.

The other thing is to keep reminding yourself that your current situation will not go on forever and things will get better. Once your divorce comes through and your life settles down abit and things are sorted out, the pressure will ease. Until then, you can at least always talk to us here. Buttercup is right. You are not alone.

Sending you a big hug, Sarah.  :hug:

Offline Sarah83

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Re: Hello
« Reply #63 on: October 10, 2019, 07:35:50 AM »
Thanks guys. I will go back to the gp and ask for counselling. I know I’m still stuck in watching my dad die, I can’t process what’s happened . I can’t deal with what else is happening because I’m stuck there. The M.E consultant I saw said if I don’t change then I could end up house bound in the future, which terrified me, but don’t know how to stop these symptoms. 

Offline Sarah83

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Re: Hello
« Reply #64 on: October 10, 2019, 07:39:27 AM »
People often say but at least you had warning he was going to die.. But I didn't, I switched off from his cancer. I always said to myself, don’t show your emotions, keep it in, be strong so I never acknowledged what was happening.

Offline Karena

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Re: Hello
« Reply #65 on: October 10, 2019, 12:50:46 PM »
I know with your illness its difficult but if you can find a way to let out that anger without harming yourself or anyone else it does help - for me thats walking up the hill behind me so fast i am too tired to be angry - before that though i used to find smashing bottles in a bottle bank helped - -my go to option with familly seemed to be washing up - bizare as that sounds - vigourous washing up - but i never actually broke anything.YOu need something more gentle though - maybe listening to music or meditation -or mindfulness - even a few minutes a day to do something that takes you away from the problems and the anger - maybe even watching - actually watching cbeebies with your little girl - that kind of innocent story telling can be quite therapeutic - al actually follow bing and the clangers on fb - no excuse whatsoe-ever other than theyre a calm in the storm that fb can be.
art is another thing you could consider again it can be quite therapeutic you dont have to be good at it you are doing it for yourself and again something you could do along side her.

Offline Sandra61

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Re: Hello
« Reply #66 on: October 11, 2019, 01:58:45 AM »
Not sure if this might help, Sarah, but there is a support organisation for M.E. sufferers. If you haven't found it yet, this is the link https://www.meassociation.org.uk/information-and-support-line/ It might help to visit the website to see if they can offer anything to help you with this illness. I have a friend who has had it for some time and does find it helpful. I believe there are local support groups you can go along to as well. Just a thought. Keep your spirits up if you can. You really are in a terribly stressful situation, so don't be too inclined to judge yourself. You need to be kind to yourself at this time.  :hug:

Offline Sarah83

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Re: Hello
« Reply #67 on: October 12, 2019, 07:39:26 PM »
Thank you all so much. I do belong to my local M.E support group and have signed up to some M.E forums also. I have had a letter today to say my divorce is proceeding, so that will be sorted by the end  of this year (unless he decides to fight the settlement). I want to start next year fresh. I need to have some peace in my mind. Everything is making the weight of loosing my dad heavier, it’s making it apparent he isn’t here. I need to come to terms with the fact he has gone but can’t because I need his help. I spent everything I have in me trying to bring up my daughter. Obviously I love her with all my heart, but I have nothing for myself and I feel empty in myself. It’s just dawning on me that I will never get over loosing my dad. I’m waiting for when I feel better but it will never be better. My life will mould around a big fat hole. Hopefully and I pray that there is something good ahead. I can’t live the next 50 years (I’m hopeful) feeling like this.