Losing confidence does seem to be an integral part of the grief journey. I guess its understandable, we have taken a big knock/hit, often our very foundations have been shaken and we often have to do new things which we didnt choose to do. I certainly lost alot of confidence
And please dont feel a nuisance - we all understand the journey here
I agree with karena, focus on the other friendships. I found over time different friendship bonds will be stronger or weaker, depending on what I was going through - and thats ok - some people may not be right for certain times. I had one friend in particular who would always see past the 'I'm fine' mask and we became much closer, whereas other friends didnt understand as they hadnt been bereaved
Dont worry about the confidence at this stage, it will come back, focus on being gentle with yourself and see that this is a time for 'healing' (just like if you had a physical injury it takes time to get back on your feet) To hopefully give you some hope, I'll share what I do. I keep a little book of new things I want to try, and at the back I keep a list of all the things I've tried and done - there's a list of gigs I've been to, list of new/unusual things I've done (flown an owl & hawk) and things I've achieved (like going for a meal alone, or to the theatre alone). That really motivates me, and reminds me of what I am capable of and gives me something to strive towards (compound bow archery is on there at the moment in my want to do list) we so often forget the things we've achieved - it's too easy to feel daunted instead. And the achievement list can be anything - anything which felt like it was a challenge to you at the time. May be too soon in your journey, but might be something to consider trying later on if it sounds like something you'd find motivating/helpful
I do find instagram is really useful for inspiration, finding ideas to try, or just viewing beautiful pictures - there's so much on there. May find it helps a bit on your journey. And seems theres several people who do random photo challenges on there, so may find one which matches your interest too xx