Be kind to yourself, Cry when you need to and just be truthful to others. Crying is a normal response to sadness and sadness is part of grief. Just tell them. Stand up to those who make you feel like you have got to keep it all together. Just politely tell them no, you can't. Like others have said they are probably only saying something because they think they have to. I've just posted about the sadness I still feel since my mum died. It's just under the surface all the time-even when I'm happy. I felt bad still crying so much and reassured my hubby that even although I still cry a lot for my mum. I'm not unhappy with him. He reassured that I was doing ok and just to keep letting it out.