Hi, i have posted a few times before which some of you have read, but I am struggling and am not sure what to do. I lost my husband of 30 years on 12th January. At first I coped ok but the last couple of months I am really struggling, crying everyday and feeling sad and lonely.
My 3 adult children live at home, 2 have learning difficulties, one has a mild form of autism and has a part time job the other is more severely autistic and is at home all the time, my eldest has a good job as a aircraft engineer and is starting training to be a commercial pilot. I live hundreds of miles from friends & family and work full time to support us.
The thing is I feel so low I don't know whether to try councilling but don't know if it would help. I don't have any issues with Terrys death, I'm not angry, he had wonderful medical care and we had good support at home, he died surrounded by love & his family and he was pain free for 99.9% of the time. His heart was diseased and it couldn't go on any longer, I get that, it comes to us all one day, so I don't know if i would gain anything from bereavement counselling, what are people's experiences?
I thought of discussing it with my doctor, she has suggested anti depressants before but I have always resisted as I am grieving not depressed, although I think I am a bit depressed now I don't see how chemicals can help, they won't change my grieving or bring me back the life I am missing.
I turned 51 a few weeks ago the thought of feeling like this for the next 20+ years is unbearable