Feeling down

[Tam]

Its been 7 months since my step dad passed away, i thought i was doing ok. I dont know if its because im pregnant and know my step dad would be so happy as my little boy ment the world to him and know this new baby would of to. I just keep thinking about things and its getting me down tonight more then ever. Our baby is due the day before the 1 year anniversary of my step dad which is also playing on my mind. Havent really told anybody how im feeling so just writing it down is helping.

[Hubby]

Hi Tam. Sorry to hear your having a bad day.

Sometimes just writing your thoughts down helps you make more sense if what is going on in your head. I think you have touched on a few things that are making things difficult for you in your post and I hope that having identified them makes it easier for you to figure out a way to cope

Wishing you strength.

 

[Tam]

Thank you xx

[Karena]

Hi Tam sorry you are having a bad day,Grief is a bit of a rollercoaster,you start to feel a bit better then it grabs you back again,knowing the date your baby will be born  is so close to the anniversary is probably making things more difficult,not that you would forget but you will be reminded all the time.but strange as it sounds now,when the baby comes perhaps the happiness of that can take away some of the sadness of that day.

[Julie Magson]

I guess there are not only the emotions of bereavement going through your mind but also those wretched hormones too you poor thing. I wonder if the timings of your baby and your step dad's Anniversary are meant to be? Can you think of it as some sort of special connection between them both? 

[Emz2014]

Sending a hug    its very much a rollercoaster, the first year has many difficulties and i imagine hormones must add to it too.  Be gentle with yourself and keep talking xx

[Tam]

Thank you everyone, me and my mum think of the baby as a gift from my step dad. I think you are all right and hormones arnt helping either and making things worse and the thought my step dad wont get to meet this baby or see my little boy grow up has all hit me at once xx

[Emz2014]

As they grow you can tell your little one all about your stepdad so they get to know him.  My dad missed meeting my niece, (my sisters 2nd) she was born prematurely before the first anniversary of losing him too but we will be telling her all the stories and showing her the photos too as she grows up
We'll also keep teaching the things dad taught us, so he will also have that presence in their lives
  xx

[Hubby]

It used to upset me to see my grandson in the first weeks after losing Margaret as he reminded me of seeing her at her happiest with him. However he quickly developed the knack of beeing able to cheer me up no matter how down I am feeling.

Babies remind us that life does go on no matter how much it might not seem like it has ground to a halt sometimes. That thought I find extremely comforting.

I'm sure your impending arrival will bring you similar comfort.