Yes I do too. Sorry to hear it's like that for you.
My girlfriend is someone who is fine and can be supportive while the lows happen. Like she was supportive enough at mums funeral and can be supportive when i'm at a total low over everything. Yet when its the time in between, she just assumes or is not as considerate.
I mean some (most) days since mums death i'm feeling awful, I might not be thinking right to give her what she wants out of a relationship, I might not say things she wants to hear me say to her and I might not be there for her as much.
Yet, there is no understanding of any of this. It's always her who feels so hard done by. Theres been so many arguments she has caused since mums death about my lack of effort and how i'm this that and the other. We argue, I explain, she "gets it" then a week later its the same arguments again.
She doesn't understand this year of firsts, how mum missed out on my 30th birthday, how theres been so much lacking in my life now and i'm trying to get myself on track (I was a carer for mum and now i'm left to do nothing).
It's all about time with her. She wants it all working right away as a fully functioning relationship with no consideration of the hard time it is for me.
What she needs to consider is after mums death i'm effectively left with nothing. No mum, no cares allowance, no caring role, no government help. I have no income now because I am unfit to work and i'm purely living off mums inheritance.
It's a harsh cycle and some partners just can't deal with or understand what the other partner is going through when they lose a loved 1