I think people who make that assumption are making it in some way based on either the age their own parents or grandparents died or national statistics - after all according to the government we are all living longer so cant have a pension when we used too - and thats what we hear over and over again.
But this really isnt unique and there is no such thing as typical unless you are looking at millions of people its just down to maths, The more people in the figure the more statistics show trends - in fact it was on the news last night that currently more people in the UK die from sepsis than cancer.
My gran on my mums side lived to be 97 she never smoked,her brothers didnt smoke either one died aged 12 in a mill accident one died working on the railways aged 18, two in the first world war. My dads sister died on titanic - My stepfather was 86 he did smoke but gave up when he met my mum 30 years before he died. - My biological father died at 62 of cancer he didnt smoke , my mum at 68 of cancer she didnt smoke . Mark was 30, he died of cancer he didnt smoke.
Two of my school friends were killed at 17 they did smoke ,but they died after being mowed down by a drunk driver.
and of course smoking isnt healthy and can shorten lives but so can alcahol and a myriad of other things - young people living perfectly healthy lives die playing sport.
so please dont think it was because you were not worth hanging round for. We look for blame then we find guilt and that means finding any way we can blame ourselves.Most people here will tell you guilt plays a big part in grief yet that guilt is not justified, everyone makes decisions which turn out to be the wrong ones
your parents smoking wasnt your decision and from their point of view we all in some way take our chances with our lives.
My friends knew that road was unlit and they were taking a chance -i know they knew because we told them but they decided too anyway and we blamed ourselves for not insisting enough.Others blamed themselves too, the landlord who served the drunk driver, the bus driver who didnt wait another couple of minutes , the parents for telling them they would have to walk home if they missed the last bus yet again - of course they would have picked them up in reality but because they said that the kids didnt ring them.
I walked up a mountain in Africa ill equiped with clothing and water and unfit, and when i was halfway up i realised that, but i carried on walking - that was me taking my chances i wasnt thinking sensibly i looked at the here and now and thought better to die here and now than in a care home in gloomy rainy England. Obviousely i survived - but i didnt at any point think i would take the chance because my children were not good enough for me to want to stay alive i can promise you that, and if it had gone wrong, i would hate for them to think that i had ever felt that way.
You are jumping ahead with the dogs - take out pet insurance and love them let them be part of your healing take them out for walks even if they are with your brother even better take them together so you can be closer too him and recognise when he is struggling, and support him any way you can,and when you are having a bad day he can support you - sometimes a hug is what we need to make a difference, but know that you are not responsible for his alcahol issues any more than you were for your parents smoking.
You will know when a decision has to be made about the dogs and you will make it when you need too purely with their welfare in mind.