I found this site a lifeline when my husband died and i hope it can become the same for you - its really hard to know what "normal" is - grief is a bumpy road, and each grief is individual - but all of us have and the deep pain of loss that goes with us everywhere. and on top of that - guilt, anger,depression, anxiety - they appear in a different order and take a different course and there are times when you can really question your sanity but then because everyone here is at some atage of the road -some-one here will recognise that emotion as something they are also feeling or have felt.
In the same way as "normal" in grief is difficult to find, "normal" in our whole lifes has gone - and we have to find a new "normal" we never asked for this change,it was thrown at us, we dont want it and we dont know how to adapt too it because especially in the early days we simply cant see any way to do that.